Abbie + Andy

the act of catching a pass in football; the manner in which something is greeted; a formal party of people; as after a wedding

2009-08-04T17:44:00.008-05:00

Yes, we are home from the honeymoon, unfortunately earlier than expected. I will explain the situation in chronological order, which means it may take a few posts to get to everything.

We had an absolutely PHENOMENAL time at our reception. However, what they say is true: it all goes by in one big blur. Before you know it, the night is over and you are just plain exhausted.

After the wedding, we finished up our outdoor photos and walked over to the Liberty Theatre for our grand entrance. I thought it would be funny to have our bridal party and ourselves announced in wrestler fashion (I even made up silly nicknames for everyone!) but Andy gently vetoed me and instead we just had the DJ say everyone's name as they walked in. It was very nice, and I'm sure we made the right choice, as my bridesmaids may not have found it as amusing as I did. :) However, I did still force my sense of humor on our bridal party by picking out their entrance music ("Too Legit to Quit" by M.C. Hammer)! For Andy and myself I chose something more nostalgic - "Wouldn't It Be Nice" by The Beach Boys, the opening tune of a cd he had made for me once upon a time.

It's a pretty strange yet magical feeling to have 130 pairs of eyes glued to you. I was just happy I didn't fall with everyone watching, although my feet did get a bit tangled over my dress as I was going up the stairs.

We had a tiny little snafu after we arrived at the head table, too. First of all, we were short one chair, and secondly, Andy and I had forgotten to ask his dad to come up after us and say the blessing for the food, so we just stood there sort of awkwardly for a minute until we found Rick and got him up on stage to pray. Luckily, Amy was able to grab a chair from somewhere at the side of the stage. This was also when I got the first inkling that our DJ was not particularly quick on his feet. It would have been nice to have him make a smoother transition, although I shouldn't blame him entirely as I didn't state that explicitly in the schedule I had given him. Also, I may be wrong, but he seemed to have some trouble saying my name. As a matter of fact, I thought he called both me and my husband "Andy"...hopefully our guests knew which was which!

Then we all filled our plates with fried chicken, baked potatoes, mac & cheese, and corn. The food was delish, but I could hardly eat a thing. After everyone had a chance to get munching, we asked them to uncork the champagne bottles on their tables, and Amy and Jason said their lovely toasts. We were so happy to share this beautiful day with our good friends!!!

Afterward, the DJ made his first big "oops" (and this one was very explicit on the schedule!) by announcing our first dance, when we had intended to cut our cake right after dinner. Not a huge problem, so we rolled with it, but I had to delay for a moment while Mom bustled my dress. And even though Andy and I hadn't really practiced, and we didn't jaunt out to any special moves, our dance was perfect. The song we chose was "I Can't Help Falling in Love with You", sung by the incomparable Michael Buble. Definitely a memory to cherish.

Next the DJ asked Andy's mom, Maureen, and my step-dad, Gary to come out for our parent dance to "What a Wonderful World" by Louis Armstrong. ("Oops" #2: It would have been nice if he would have waited to start the music until Gary was actually on the dance floor!) Of course, this was still a wonderful few minutes for the two of us to connect to the very dear people in our lives.

After our two special dances, I started off to mingle with some folks. One of my tiny regrets of the evening is that I didn't get very far! I wish I would have made more time to say "Hi! Thanks for coming!" to every single person, but I definitely missed a few. I think that Andy at least stopped to talk to many of the people I didn't make it to.

Then before too long, it was time to cut the cake, which tasted just as good as it looked! Andy and I didn't play the "smash-it-in-your-face" game, which was nice, too :) I thought it was a pretty cute idea to have the DJ play "Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch" during this time.

My mom should get most of the credit for arranging that table, as she made the punch and the mints (yum!), and bought the napkins, plates, forks, nuts and bowls.

My friends and former roommates Cassy and Megan were dolls for putting up with my last-minute cake-cutting instructions. They did a wonderful job, as did Andy's sister Joanna, who was unexpectedly thrown into the role of a "day-of coordinator", which she fulfilled very gracefully, and for which I will be eternally grateful!!!

When it came time to toss the garter, it seemed the boys were nowhere to be found. (Unbeknownst to us at the time, they were out decorating a car - the wrong car, as a matter of fact. More about that later.) Eventually we had some guys lined up and ready to go, and Andy slipped off my garter to the tune of "Girls Night Out" by The Judds - "Oops" #3 on the part of the DJ, who mixed it up with my bouquet-tossing song, which was NOT supposed to be "Wild Thing" by The Troggs. Sigh.

Andrew, my friend/hair stylist Kim's son, was the lucky garter-catcher. I sincerely hope that at his tender age he is not the next to be married! The same holds true for my cousin Makayla, who caught the bouquet. Note to brides: it's a good idea to practice throwing that thing, as I did a pitiful job. It went up, not out, when I tossed it. Oh, well.

I really enjoyed doing the dollar dance next, as it gave me a chance to converse with many of the charming fellows that attended our wedding, although the groomsmen were conspicuously absent for most of the dance (Remember the getaway car decorating? They still weren't quite done with car #2 at this point).

It was also sweet to see Andy leading his sisters and his niece around the floor.

All of our non-formal dances were fun too. Who can resist the Cotton-Eyed Joe, the Cupid Shuffle or shakin' it to a little AC/DC?

The only thing that made any of the reception mildly less enjoyable for myself was being stuck in a beautiful dress that felt a lot like an oven. I wouldn't have taken that thing off for anything (oh, man, I can't even tell you how much I loved my dress!), but I would have sincerely appreciated having an air conditioner installed in the skirt.

Suddenly, it was 11:00. Our DJ played "You Look Wonderful Tonight" (in my humble opinion, you can't end a perfect evening without Eric Clapton), and the last of our guests started heading out the door. Andy and I weren't ready for the party to end, but we were so worn out we couldn't have stayed much longer anyway!

This is when we finally saw the impressive "decorating" job to my car done by Andy's friends.

Keep in mind they mistakenly did the same thing to Andy's parents' Mini Coop first!

It was quite a sight.

Unfortunately I had been chauffeured around by my accommodating maid of honor all day, and had absent-mindedly left my car keys back at the hotel, so Andy and I had to take his dad's other car to the hotel, get my keys, come back and pick up my car, peel off enough cardboard and aluminum foil to make the thing drivable, run through the automatic car wash so that the shoe polish didn't ruin the paint, and then finally arrived at the Lyons Mansion and had a chance to relax.

A beautiful, beautiful day.

Our Big Day

2009-07-27T09:24:00.031-05:00

Whew! Andy and I definitely had an exhausting weekend and are ready to get going on our honeymoon. We were planning on leaving Wednesday but we are thinking about heading out tomorrow instead. I don't even know if I have the strength left to do a full wedding recap, but I'll try.

After a somewhat hectic Thursday night and Friday morning (bachelor party boys greatly interfered with my prep time!), I headed to Ft. Scott, car loaded down with more wedding decorations, clothing, and toiletry items than any one person should ever be in charge of at one time. I arrived at the Liberty Theatre about 2:30, and my maid of honor, Amy, helped me to set out all our guest table centerpieces, as well as arranging the head table and the cake table decorations.

A bit later the rest of my family, my bridesmaids, and Andy's family came over to finish up with the final touches. Then we all set out down the block for the rehearsal at the church.

The rehearsal went very smoothly, although Andy was about as nervous as a person could be!

I don't think he was having cold feet, though, just ready to finally be married!

Afterwards we had dinner, which was delish. It was barbecued pork loin, baked beans, potato salad and yummy rolls, catered by Sugarfoot and Peaches. Maureen, Andy's mom, did an awesome job with the decorations, too.

After hanging out for a bit, everyone else went home while Amy and I spent the night at bridesmaid Amanda's house in Pittsburg. They of course got roped into doing the last-minute wedding task of folding programs, but at least we all had a glass of wine to make the experience slightly less tedious.

In the morning the three of us ran into Wal-Mart for a few supplies. It seemed like a good photo opportunity, except that some man behind us thought we were snapping his picture. Whoops!

I was a little worried about the rain that morning, but after we got settled into our room at the Lyons Mansion Bed & Breakfast all I saw were pretty blue skies. Then I was worried that it was going to be terribly hot and humid - and it was. But that sort of comes with the territory for a July wedding.

Nevertheless, it was nice and cool inside "Preecia's Velvet Hideaway" and the accompanying sitting room where Kim Stewart beautified us ladies.

And I could not have loved my hair more, even if it was made of pure gold! She did an awesome job, and my do didn't move once all night. I was a little bummed that I had to cover it up with a veil (loved my handmade veil, too, though - ah, the difficult decisions of a bride).

I had butterflies in my stomach all morning, but they started going C-R-A-Z-Y about 4:30, when Megan Dittmer, the female half of our team of wedding photographers, arrived. That meant it was time to put on the dress! Amy helped slip it over my head, Mom zipped me up, Amanda hooked on my jewelry, Loren slid the garter up my leg, and Hannah fastened my shoes. At last, I was ready to roll!

Somehow we managed to get me and my poofiness down the stairs and out the back of the mansion.

Then we got started on photos of me and the girls.

Before I knew it, everyone was back in the car and on their way to the church. I couldn't believe it was really happening! One by one, my mom went in, then my maid of honor, bridesmaids, flower girl, and then...it was my turn!

Wagner's "Bridal Chorus" from the opera Lohengrin played as I put one foot in front of the other and made my way down the aisle, locking eyes with Andy first and then trying to absorb the happy faces of all our friends and family. It's difficult to describe a moment so special.

Rex, the pastor that Andy grew up with, welcomed everyone and said the opening prayer, and then Andy's sister Joanna read a special passage from the Bible. Everyone joined in one of my favorite hymns called "The Love of Christ is Rich and Free", which represented how Andy and I feel about marriage and its connection to our relationship with God. Rex spoke about all of the things that meant the very most to us at that moment, and then it was time to exchange the vows. Such a powerful experience.

We had a few foibles when it came to the exchange of rings. Andy couldn't quite get mine over the knuckle, and for some reason when it was my turn I got flustered and reached for his right hand instead of his left. Thankfully those are easy things to laugh about!

We lit our unity candle and took a moment to pray together as Olivia sang "The Wedding Song (There is Love)". And then, at last, all of our guests were introduced to the new Mr. and Mrs. Biery!

We let everyone exit, then came back outside amidst cheers and rampant birdseed-throwing (most of which seemed to make its way down my dress!).

Andy and I climbed into his parents' adorable Mini Coop and drove around town for a minute, then we came back inside for more group shots.

Our photographers also captured some amazing portraits of us as a couple.

And then it was party time!

The reception description, however, will have to wait for another day, when the Mrs. has yet more time and energy.

Personal Note

2009-07-21T20:04:00.003-05:00

I need to acknowledge that the past few weeks have been a very difficult time for me and my family due to the death of my grandmother. While I don't feel comfortable blogging about such intensely personal matters, I would like everyone to know how blessed I have been by their thoughtful words and prayers.

Showered With Love

2009-07-21T19:00:00.012-05:00

We are getting married in four - count 'em, four! - days. Mind-boggling.

At the moment I am choosing not to dwell on that so as to avoid having my brain implode, and instead will focus on how we have been wonderfully blessed to get a multitude of home-making items from my two bridal showers (one in Scammon and one at work), as well as folks who have mailed us gifts.

I've had quite a bit of fun with this stage of pre-wedding parties. I mean, what's not to like? Food, friends, family, flowers...not to mention other delightful things that start with less alliterative letters.

I do get present-opening-in-front-of-an-audience anxiety, though, which I've had to work through. But as Andy says, that's not the worst kind of anxiety a person could have, by any means!

Amanda and Tracie were wonderful at putting together the family-oriented party in SEK.

As you might have guessed, I had a nice big plateful of veggies, crackers, dip, fruit, cream cheese mints and, of course, cake.

I couldn't resist the strawberry poke cake or punch at my work shower, either.

Don't worry, I didn't eat the whole thing - had to leave some for my work buddies!

I love all of the kitchen stuff that we've got. You can count on me doing a lot of baking once the wedding craziness is over.

I'm excited to get our house ready for the public eye, too, which is why decorative items also come in handy. We even received ourselves in abstract wooden form, which will look very nice in the living room.

And now that we've got these things strewn all about the house, my job is mostly to unpack them, and then make sure Andy doesn't throw away the boxes of everything that hasn't been tried yet, as he is wont to do.

Everyone's generosity has been amazing, and we are very very thankful for that.

The Day is Fast Approaching!‏

2009-07-15T19:08:00.004-05:00

I was somewhat awe-stricken yesterday to realize our wedding was only 11 days away. I had been using the phrase "two weeks" to describe our countdown, which was exciting enough but still allowed just a bit of space between me and the date, when all of a sudden July 25th crept up on me! It is now significantly less than two weeks away!!!

I can't even describe how exciting and nerve-wracking that realization is. We are going to be married in no time at all. It's fantastic and slightly overwhelmingly. And despite all these thoughts and feelings running through my head, I still have to get on with normal life, not to mention finishing up wedding planning.

We had a little snag this week when we discovered a miscommunication between ourselves and the owners of the church. We had been given the impression we were free to use the back rooms of the church, and that they would be available the day before the wedding, and so had planned to have the rehearsal dinner there. Well, come to find out, there actually is a significant charge associated with using that room. Luckily, Andy was able to wheedle them into cutting the price in half. It wouldn't have been the worst thing in the world to have to relocate the dinner, but it just added unnecessary stress at this point.

We are also having some minor difficulty in finding good outdoor photo spots. Andy wanted to take some with his groomsmen on the grounds of the fort, but since it is technically a national park, you have to fill out a form and pay a fee for permission to do this. This may be a bit more of a hassle than we are willing to work through at the moment. We do have plenty of back-up spots that should be fine, but I like to have all these details worked out before the last moment and, truly, this is getting pretty darn close to the last moment!

On the bright side, most of our other details are happily settled. I have a bit of work to do on some of our centerpieces, but our florist, caterer, baker, dj, venue coordinator and bartenders are all good to go.

My main fear now is forgetting one of the trillion things that I am responsible for getting to the wedding. Of course, I made a list, but I have a feeling that I am going to be running around like a headless chicken on Friday, cramming stuff into my car pell-mell only seconds before I have to head to Ft. Scott, so let's just cross our fingers that everything that should get in there, does, and that when I go to take it out, it's all still in one piece.

Stressed? Stressed?! We're too busy to be stressed!‏

2009-06-23T22:38:00.006-05:00

It's getting down to crunch time, and at this point wedding planning does start to make perfectly sane people go a little wacky. I can't deny I've had a few tearful "I'm-so-overwhelmed!" moments, but all in all I'm trying to keep a healthy, happy attitude. Sometimes Andy is helpful with this, and sometimes not - he definitely doesn't like thinking of everything we have left to accomplish and everything that can go wrong, but overall he does try to have a sunny disposition for my sake.

I have, as I am wont to do, probably taken on a few too many DIY projects. However, I have made myself a lovely little to-do list to keep everything straight, and I am not afraid to start cutting things off the list. If watching Food Network Challenge has taught me anything, it's that you've got to be willing to sacrifice a few elements here and there for the sake of the whole - you are guaranteed not to be lucky enough to finish every fabulous thing you wanted in the time allotted.

Last night I almost finished making my veil. For my first try, it really didn't go too badly. I think if I did it again I would use a little bit more fabric to make it a smidge poofier, but all in all I'm pretty happy with it. I actually started on it several weeks ago, but I threw a bit of a hissy fit after I accidentally cut a hole in my tulle and had to set it aside for awhile so I could regroup. (The fabric, by the way, is ridiculously inexpensive. For $3 I bought enough to make at least two and maybe three single-layer veils.) Yesterday I decided to try just slicing off the edge where I cut the hole and seeing if the veil was still long enough to suit my taste, and surprisingly it was. Someday I might try to blog some instructions for making your own, because really it's insanely easy, at least if you make one as simple as I did. The most difficult part was getting it cut with straight edges to the right size, because the cutting mat I bought for this purpose was nowhere near big enough to lay the fabric out flat - I had to quadruple fold it, which does not make for beautiful straight edges. (But who's going to notice?) I had a bit of trouble sewing my veil onto the comb, too, because it was so big. I really wanted to use a wire one, though, and I couldn't find any smaller ones, so I'm going to make it work.

Next up on the agenda we have decorations, flower girl accessories, programs...and so on and so forth. Meanwhile, Andy has been planning our honeymoon to San Antonio and Galveston. He has taken care of almost everything himself, which makes me a very happy girl. I trust him to arrange something wonderful for us!

Last weekend I had my bachelorette/birthday party. We planned it for a little bit farther away from the wedding than most folks might, but I wanted to make sure all of my bridesmaids could make it, and this was the best day we could come up with. Needless to say, we had a great time! We played some fun games at my house, had yummy snacks, and all of my friends got to know each other a bit. Plus I received some really beautiful gifts - and a few that made me blush!!! Later we went to the Power & Light District. We had a blast shakin' our booties in the Shark Bar, not to mention boot-scootin' through the PBR Bar.

This weekend we have more big plans. On Friday I'm going to take the day off of work so that Andy and I can move my stuff into our new house in Prairie Village. I'm going to finish cleaning up the old house on Saturday, then drive down to SEK so I can have my wedding dress fitted properly, and maybe practice my wedding hairstyle, too. Then on Sunday I'm being thrown a shower in Scammon, which is sure to be fun. Other than moving, I think Andy's major objective is to watch a fireworks demonstration somewhere in Missouri. Hopefully he'll find some good stuff to shoot off this Independence Day. I expect to be wowed!

Oh, and I think our flowers are pretty much finalized. I don't know much about flora (or fauna, for that matter), but Russ of Designer's Florist by Sekan was very very helpful when Amy and I visited with him last week, so I'm quite optimistic that we will have bright, beautiful arrangements. And that just goes to show that you can have fresh flowers without spending thousands of dollars on them. But then again maybe that's because I'm just not the kind of girl that needs to see an orchid bouquet in every bathroom stall...

We Request the Honour of Your Presence‏

2009-06-08T22:25:00.012-05:00

Our invitations are almost ready to be sent! This is the cause of much rejoicing, because although they have turned out to be quite beautiful, they were definitely a pain in the neck from start to finish.

Being somewhat crafty, I knew I couldn't just order standard invites from any old place. I wanted them to be my own personal work of art, albeit a somewhat thrifty work of art. I gathered ideas from catalogs, magazines, the internet, Paper Source, Archiver's, Hobby Lobby...you name it, I probably looked at it. Finally I decided I would go for a simple piece of cardstock, printed with our name, and some sort of intricate and flowy corner design.

White and ivory are the standard when it comes to cardstock, but I am a huge fan of color, so my first thought was to find blue paper and print it with silver ink. Enter road block #1 - silver ink for home printers is an elusive beast, nearly as difficult to track down as a two-headed polka dot unicorn. Silver ink at the printer, if they even do it, is rather expensive. So, I flip-flopped, determined to find silver paper that could be printed with blue ink. I found an absolutely wonderful site (probably one of my all-time faves) called paperandmore.com, which is not only simple and straightforward to use, but also has great prices, reasonable shipping, and stellar samples, not to mention useful hints and tips for designing your own invites and other wedding accoutrements.

I ordered a boat-load of samples in various styles and colors, including some paperweight silver and some cardstock weight silver. My printer couldn't print on the cardstock but it could on the paperweight, and playing around with it allowed me to decide against blue ink after all - it just didn't pop. I decided we would do black ink (cheaper anyway) on the silver cardstock, and then do our stamped design in blue ink. A lovely compromise.

Note that at up to this point Andy had no input or involvement whatsoever.

But as you may know, he has a lot of free time lately, which really comes in handy between the hours of 8 and 5. He was sent on a mission to find an economical printer for our silver cardstock. Luckily, Kinkos said they could do it for less than $30, including cutting. Score!

I went along my merry way, ordering 100 5x7 sheets of silver to fit in the A7 blue metallic envelopes I bought on clearance at Paper Source (bargain hunting is my forte), and 100 sheets of 8.5x11 silver for our enclosures.

Then I got to work actually designing the invitation itself. I had found a delightful stamp at The Scrapbook Page, so I carefully measured my margins to make sure everything would fit with the wording I had chosen. I even downloaded some free fonts to get just the style I had imagined. I made a cute little RSVP postcard so that we wouldn't have to worry about another envelope, and devoted hours (way too many hours, for that matter) on a map of Fort Scott. The town is not at all difficult to navigate, so I don't know why I bothered, but I had fun, and I like to think the result is somewhat impressive.

Finally, one Sunday I trundled off to Kinkos with my PDFs on a flash drive and a boxful of paper. This is where the story takes a turn for the worst.

The two guys working there were at best 18. Friendly enough, sure, but I didn't enjoy standing there for 20 minutes before they actually printed my sample copies. I imagine the four other waiting customers didn't enjoy it much either. I have no idea what was taking so long. They seemed to be doing something for somebody, but it was a little unclear what made that task so time-consuming. At long last, they printed my three sheets of paper.

It turns out, Kinko's can NOT effectively print 107# weight metallic (in other words, slippery) cardstock. The paper sort of went through but it got all crinkly and had to be pulled out when it jammed at the end. I was so mad I could have cried. Who tells you they can do something when they clearly can't?!?

This meant Andy had to be sent back out into the field to find a printer who could actually print. Luckily, he found Z3 Graphix, who actually could do what they said they could. They used presses instead of lasers to get the job done, which was neither terribly cheap nor terribly expensive, so in the long run, I suppose no lasting harm was done, other than that I have a less-than-fond opinion of Kinko's now.

Now we were ready to do the real work of decorating and assembling the invites. My paper-crafting whiz of a roommate, Cortney, convinced me that embossing powder was the only way to go - and she was right, they looked stellar with a raised motif. However, this was a rather time-consuming endeavor. You see, you have to first stamp the paper with clear ink, then sprinkle on the power, then heat it with a special embossing tool. But it was worth it, if I do say so myself.

Surprisingly, Andy had a natural affinity for this stamping process. I was impressed with his diligence.

Meanwhile, I worked on hand-addressing each of our 105 or so envelopes with silver marker.

In hindsight, perhaps it would have been smarter to just have ordered everything in its completed form, including address labels. But where's the fun in that?

Oh, and of course the final detail was the purchasing and application of the stamps. I was excited to get the new wedding ring ones (thankfully we didn't need to shell out the extra 17 cents for the equally charming wedding cake stamps). However, I am still a little miffed that the only option for our postcards was a polar bear. That's practically the definition of incongruous.

But oh well. All in all, they look pretty stellar, no?

"One should either be a work of art, or wear a work of art."

2009-05-28T15:51:00.001-05:00

My mom thinks it's awfully funny these days to call me Bridezilla. And I have to admit, I have gone ever so slightly insane over one very significant wedding detail, which I am about to explain. But I haven't become totally rude and obnoxious - or at least that's my hope - so I would really prefer a nickname with just a smidge more class and a smidge less giant destructive lizard monstrosity.

I've been pretty embarrassed to say this, so I'll get it over with quickly: I ordered another wedding dress off the internet a few days after I received the first one. Whew. But don't worry, it gets even more embarrassing: I bought a third dress from a store in Pittsburg last Thursday.

No one may be impressed by this, but in case you are wondering, yes, the third dress is "The Dress." I absolutely love it and feel beautiful in it and wish I could wear it over and over. The first two just didn't give me that feeling. I wanted them to, but they just didn't quite have that magical quality.

Anyone who sees me on a regular basis will testify to the fact that I don't spend all that much money on clothes. Yes, it's undeniable, I own a lot, but you will rarely see me wearing anything more high dollar than a cutesy shirt from Maurice's. As a matter of fact, I'm willing to bet that at least 75% of my garments are from JCPenney - and no doubt a quarter of those were clearance! (I like to think that somehow I still manage to be more fashionable than my adorably clueless other half, who patently refuses to buy new garments under anything less than dire circumstances.) Thus, a good portion of this drama was caused by my being utterly appalled at the cost of wedding dresses. It still blows my mind that it is so ridiculously difficult to find a nice new dress for less than five benjamins. Even if you aren't counting tax and the almost universally necessary alterations!

So, I bought the first dress at a much better price than one might have expected, the caveat being that I had never tried it on or even seen it in person. Or even in a realistic photo. Unfortunately, even though it was beautiful and quite well-made, in my humble opinion, it just didn't fit quite right. I wasn't comfortable in it. And it didn't wow me like so many of the more expensive dresses I had tried on in the store did.

So, I ordered another one from the same place, but in a different style that I thought might suit me better. I very anxiously waited for this one. After all, I was running out of time! You are supposed to order dresses at least 6 months in advance, and I definitely was past that point. What would I do if I didn't like it?

Well, it got here, and at first glance it was just what I had ordered. But, it still just wasn't quite right. In some ways it fit me better than the first had, and in some ways it fit me worse. That wouldn't be a total catastrophe since I still could have had it altered, but at the end of the day, I still just didn't love it. Woe is me. Obviously it takes a better person than myself to be content with a less-than-perfect wedding dress.

So, I went back to The Jean Scene to try on the one dress I had really and truly liked, but had talked myself out of. You see, it too had some fit problems. The thought of me flashing our pastor, or better yet, an entire church full of friends and relatives, kept me from ordering it in the first place. On top of that, I didn't think I had the greatest service there, since I went during prom season and they were terribly understaffed and not nearly as professional as most of the other stores I had gone to. But in this situation, I was willing to give it another shot.

Once I put it back on, I knew that it was the one I should wear on my wedding day. Even though it regretfully cost quite a bit more than either of the ones I had already purchased, it was absolutely perfect (except, of course, for those darn inescapable alterations). And I still got a bit of a deal on it, since I bought the sample. Even though Mom thinks I'm the silliest thing ever, she was happy to make me happy by helping with the dress.

And, because God is good, I already sold one of the other ones to another budget bride over the internet! What a beautiful thing :)

Celebrity China & Crystal

2009-05-14T22:49:00.004-05:00

One thing first-time-bridal-fair-goers ought to be made aware of is the fact that, although by divulging their contact info they may indeed win some fabulous prize (an Alfred Sung wedding dress and a honeymoon in Jamaica were up for grabs at the one I intended, for instance), they are absolutely guaranteed to be besieged by emails and phone calls from vendors who are much more interested in making money than in giving it away. Such is the case with Celebrity China and Crystal. This is their spiel:

CCC - "Hi Abbie!" (Note the exclamation point. It indicates a whole lot of fake enthusiasm) "I'm just calling to let you and Andy know that we have some free gifts for you!"

Abbie - "Oh really? What exactly are these gifts?"

CCC - "We're giving you a fabulous pair of real crystal 24 lead toasting glasses, and deluxe hotel accommodations!"

Abbie - "Mmmhmm. So what do I have to do to get these things?"

CCC - "Just come on down and listen to our cookware presentation! You'll even get to try some of the food from the demonstration!"

Abbie - "Are you sure I don't have to buy anything? And how long is this presentation, really?"

CCC - "Nope, you don't have to buy a thing, just listen! The presentation is usually less than an hour!"

Abbie - "OK, I guess I can do that." (Also note that Abbie is fairly easy to persuade.)

Keep in mind this conversation occurred after they had left approximately 7 messages on my phone over a matter of weeks. I imagine the only way to avoid this is to either agree to show up, or else demand right away to be taken off of their list.

So, dutiful person that I am, one evening I reluctantly trudged to their showroom in Lenexa. Two important points: a) Andy didn't want to go, although he did sort of half-heartedly offer to come eventually, so I didn't make him, and b) I was about 5 minutes late. Neither of these seemed like a big deal to me until I walked into the waiting room, where there was not a soul in sight to tell me where to go, and when I did eventually realize I needed to walk right through the next door into the showroom, I was greeted by approximately eight couples. Needless to say, I stuck out like a sore thumb. Ten minutes later my mood improved slightly when another couple walked in even later than myself. But they were still a two-person unit and I was still alone, so it wasn't much of an improvement.

The biggest surprise of the night was that I was actually interested in what the lady was trying to sell. Don't let the name fool you - these people know what's up in the modern wedding market, and it ain't china and crystal. Of course she did talk about how they never discontinue a china pattern, and they've got an amazing replacement policy, and you can even get the "everyday china" that can go in the microwave and the dishwasher...but even young Johnson Countians aren't throwing lavish dinner parties and passing their heirlooms down to the grandchildren these days.

What Celebrity China and Crystal is really trying to get you to buy is VitaCraft cookware (which is actually a Shawnee, KS company. At any rate, they have a little outlet store that I drove by about 100 times without ever knowing what it was.) And VitaCraft cookware is cool. Although it can be used on a regular gas or electric store, it's actually made to be used with an induction cook top, which means it uses magnets to create heat. I haven't done any fact checking, but the salesperson said it was big in Japan, where electricity is expensive. I'm willing to take her word on it.

The pots and pans work kind of like pressure cookers, and they seemed easy to clean. You can even stack them three high and cook in all three at once - no joke! You don't have have to add oil or even water to your food to cook it properly, either. The saleslady fried us a chicken breast (perfectly cooked in 10 minutes), and some carrots and potatoes (cooked together, with no flavor transfer). They had nice knives, too. I was honestly tempted to buy.

Until, of course, they get to the kicker. And that would be the price. I'm sorry, but I just can't fancy myself with a $2000 set of cookware. (Keep in mind this is the 5 piece set.) Sure, they throw in some china place settings, a couple forks, and a few other "freebies", but somehow I was just unable to commit to a two year plan that would take all the money out of my paycheck that I am currently saving by not parking in the garage at work. And I want to park in the garage! I don't like wading through the snow-covered sidewalks and four-foot-deep mud pits that Hallmark refuses to take care of. But it isn't worth $60 a month to me, and neither is the pan I will probably burn to a crisp while attempting to cook an omelet. (Not to mention Andy doesn't even like eggs. Or cooking. He'd probably be happy if all we ever ate were Lean Cuisine frozen dinners.)

On the bright side, although they gave me slightly dirty looks when I asked for my free gift and hightailed it out of there, I ended up with two crystal glasses that we will be using at the wedding, deluxe hotel accommodations that we most likely won't use at all, and a new fascination with induction cooking. Probably not the worst way to spend an evening!

It's here!

2009-03-26T21:06:00.007-05:00

After much much much anxious anticipation, my wedding gown has finally arrived! The bridal store in China gave me the tracking number on March 20th, my package landed in the U.S. on the 22nd, was released from customs on the 23rd, and dropped by my house at 9:50 am on the 24th. Unfortunately, no one was home to receive it, so it got taken back to the post office. That's where a bit of trouble began. The P.O. is only open from 8:30 to 5:00, which are the same working hours I have. I talked to my boss and she said it would be ok if I came in a little bit late Wednesday so that I could get my dress that morning. However, when I went home and looked at my delivery notice, I realized that the dress wasn't at the Shawnee P.O. but at one in Kansas City, KS. I really did not want to drive all the way over there and then drive back home to drop off my dress, and then drive back to work, and I didn't want to take the dress to work with me, so I enlisted the aid of wonderful Andy to go pick it up for me.

This is the text I got at 3:25 PM yesterday:

It wasnt at the kc, ks office. the stupid govt operated and nearly bankrupt u.s.
postal system screwed up. idiots. heading to shawnee. hope its there.

Yep, that's my baby.

Happily, it was at the Shawnee P.O. I had originally thought it should be, and Andy dropped the envelope - yes, no lie, it came in a not-so-padded envelope - off at my house. Eventually I arrived home, ripped into the package, and stepped into the dress. Ah, a sigh of relief. It is the perfect color. It is the correct size. The style is very close to what I asked for, the beading is pretty, and it doesn't look like it is falling apart! All those nerve-wracking moments paid off, because I got my wedding dress and it looked great! What a fabulous moment. Best of all, four months from now I get to wear it on the day that I marry my love.

We both have had a lot of financial worries the past few months, what with the depressing economy, Andy's tenuous job situation, and the added burden of the wedding, but God had provided us with a lot of wonderful options and I know our day is going to be very special.

And now I get to go buy some sweet, sweet shoes. Nothing wrong with that :)

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, Sugar Is Sweet, And So Are You!

2009-03-08T22:32:00.002-05:00

There are a surprising number of people in this world who bake cakes for a living. This is a good thing, since it gives us lots of choices, but it can also make it overwhelming to sort through 50 portfolios to find the best one, especially when small town bakers rarely have websites with their pictures on them. Speaking of which, there is a lady named Rebecca Sutterby who lives in a VERY small town in SEK, and has a fabulous website with lots of pictures. Unfortunately, cakes that are that stupendous cost about $6.50 a slice. Not bad if you're only buying a slice or two, but a little ridiculous if you're serving 100 people or more.

I am hoping to meet sometime with another decorator named Jan Beltram, who came highly recommended and has much more reasonable prices, but we are having difficulties matching up our schedules. I don't really know what exactly I want the cake to look like anyway, so it's probably good that I have a bit of time to figure out some details.

I did manage to meet with a florist in Ft. Scott on Friday afternoon. The name of the place is Designer's Florist by Sekan, and under the more general name of Sekan's Occasion Shops they actually run quite an impressive operation, selling flowers, furniture, home decorating items, invitations, and what-have-you. We talked over a few of my ideas and discussed prices, but essentially she said I would need to come back at the beginning of June to finalize exactly what I wanted and what the cost would be. I am fairly certain I would like to have them do our flowers, but I also need to do a little more shopping around to be sure we are getting a good deal.

My friend Cortney and I have also been doing a lot of brainstorming over invitation designs, and I think we've finally come up with something that will be close to the finished product. I have found some pretty paper on the internet that I will probably order so that we can get started on those soon.

Summer will be here before I know it! I can't wait :)

"step by step, ooh baby, gonna get to you gi-i-i-irl!"

2009-02-28T19:23:00.005-06:00

Please tell me you know where this entry title came from! Hint: one of my favorite songs at age 5.

Andy is still totally perplexed about how all these details are going to come together, but I love the feeling of fitting each piece of the puzzle in exactly where it belongs. I actually think it all is starting to flow quite nicely!

Andy did a great job finding a DJ and negotiating a good price for us, which is the one task I gave him to accomplish all by himself. We are going to be using Platinum Soundworks. The difficult part with vendors is that most of the time you can't exactly give them a trial run before the big day ("Hey Mr. d.j., why don't you just drop by the house Tuesday night and spin us some records?" seems like a bit of an odd request), but we were both impressed by his website and his sound system, and Andy said he was very professional on the phone. Most impressive of all, he is a bona fide acoustic engineer.

After quite a bit of waffling over all the options, we have also settled on a caterer. If you know anything at all about Pittsburg, KS, which is located about 30 miles south of Ft. Scott, you probably know that fried chicken is practically a historical institution there. Much as I would have loved to have had Fabio from Top Chef come with his delectable Italian accent and serve us a delectable Italian entree, super fancy food is a bit outside of our budget. Also, I'm not really sure that anyone I know would be impressed with anything gourmet anyway - the portions are always so small! The chicken and sides that we order should be hot, tasty, and filling, so I think we made the right choice.

Oh, and I also purchased (on sale, of course) some envelopes that I liked for the invitations. This is probably moving a bit backwards since I don't have any of the invitations yet, but I've got a solid idea of what I want, so it made sense to me at the time.

Next up: a florist and a baker.

P.S. If you want to leave a comment and don't want to log in, just choose the "name/url" option and only type your name in. That way you won't have to be "anonymous."

maybe next I should go skydiving!

2009-02-18T21:33:00.004-06:00

I'm not totally opposed to spending a decent amount of money on a wedding dress, but sadly, even with all my searching, I have not found something in a store that I absolutely fell in love with. But, there were two that I liked an awful lot. I just had a hard time committing all that money to something that didn't absolutely blow me away. So, I scoured ebay, oncewed.com, preownedweddingweddingdresses.com, and did about 1001 google searches before I gave up on the idea of finding something used that I liked for a reasonable price. This led to the self-realization that I have expensive taste. There are lots of beautiful, simple-ish dresses to be had for under $300...but that's not what I want. And I'm definitely not spending $1000 on a dress that someone has already worn! What is a girl to do?

A few fun forums (at weddingchannel.com, kvetch.indiebride.com, and windsorpeak.com), despite their occasional negativity, convinced me that I could get a custom-made dress for a reasonable amount of dough, in a reasonable amount of time, if only I am willing to risk paying for something I have never even seen, let alone tried on. I can't say that I'm an overwhelmingly gutsy person, but being at my wit's end, I went for it. Yes, last week I sent money (don't get too anxious about that part, PayPal was invented for this very reason) to a man in China who has a somewhat flimsy grasp of the English language (makes me wish I knew a little Mandarin - French hasn't done much for me when it comes to wedding planning!), so that he can buy some fabric in a color interpreted by his eyes via a computer monitor and with it create some sort of fanciful concoction that I am meant to fit into and theoretically look good in on my wedding day. Whew. Needless to say, I am anxiously awaiting my masterpiece, and obviously I will let every one know if it turns out badly. If not, you will be able to see it about 5 months from now!

I am from here forward dubbing myself the Evel Kneival of wedding planning.

pretty maids all in a row

2009-01-27T21:50:00.002-06:00

I have not managed to actually purchase my gown, as of yet, but I have narrowed it down to one, I think, and I'm planning to go back to the store next weekend, try it on again, and decide for sure. Hope it's as pretty as I think it was!

But, we did manage to pick out some pretty snazzy bridesmaid dresses this past Saturday, which was grand. They are going to be cobalt with a platinum ribbon. I'm happy to see our color scheme coming together!

three down, only 57 million to go!

2009-01-21T01:09:00.003-06:00

On Monday I met with our newly hired wedding photographers, Jason and Megan Dittmer. They are a young couple who have only been doing weddings for about a year and a half, but their photos are spectacular! They will probably have a better idea of what all is actually going on at the wedding than I will, so I am really excited to see how everything will turn out when I finally get to see the results.

Andy's sister Joanna has also agreed to do our engagement photos about which (like all things wedding-related) I am thrilled. I am hoping she has some fun ideas for us, since my brain is a little scattered at the moment and Andy is completely clueless when it comes to photography. As a matter of fact, he didn't believe me when I said engagement photos were pretty standard these days, and had to call his friend Ryan for confirmation. Unfortunately for me, Ryan had never heard of engagement photos either, so I did lose a little ground on that discussion. (You'll note that I won overall, though. :) Finding something suitable to dress him in will be the next challenge.

Last week we also reserved our church, the St. Andrews Wedding Chapel, which I mentioned in my last post, and our reception hall, which will be the Liberty Theatre. Both places are absolutely gorgeous, which will make decorating a snap, thereby making me very very happy.

I have narrowed down my wedding gown choices to two, and I am hoping to decide between them this weekend. My bridesmaids will also all be going to pick out their dresses, so it should be a fun time, as long as there isn't any hair-pulling, biting or scratching, with all that estrogen in one place at the same time. Just kidding, of course, my friends, sisters, myself, and my mom get along like a charm...in public anyway.

Next up, Andy and I will be tackling a caterer. Hopefully this will turn out to be an effective negotiating technique. I'll let you know how it goes!

oh, the places you'll go...

2009-01-12T20:30:00.002-06:00

Andy and I have settled on Fort Scott, KS as our happy medium location for the wedding, with the date being July 25, 2009. Now we are in the midst of trying to find suitable places for the ceremony, the reception, and the photos. This is not the easiest thing to do when you have to cram it all into one or two trips! Luckily, we easily found a beautiful place for the ceremony: St. Andrew's Episcopal Church. It is a lovely historic church with gorgeous stained glass windows and a pipe organ. (We would be happy to have referrals if you know someone who actually plays the pipe organ!)

We also liked the Old Congregational Church but it would have taken quite a bit more work to get into shape. Still, it had a wonderful tall steeple with a bell you can ring yourself, as well as really beautiful stained glass windows.

The reception location has been a little bit harder. I had high hopes for the Scottish Rite Masonic Temple, but it was a little disappointing, although still not out of the question. I don't know anything about the actual group, other than that they have 32 degrees. I don't know what that means. But, Andy and I were lucky enough to get to see their auditorium, which was substantially neater than their dining hall and has all the original backdrops they need to perform the 32 degrees. Whatever that means. All I know is, I saw columns and forests and animals and architecture, and it was pretty nifty.

We also went to the Liberty Theatre, located right across the street, which is one of our top picks. It's very nicely decorated inside, spacious, and flexible for our catering needs. Equally nice was the River Room, a newly renovated space on the third floor of an old manufacturing building. The bottom floors aren't done yet, but by the summer the building should also house a restaurant and retail shops. (Andy was disappointed that they weren't going to put in a bowling alley and skating rink that had been there years ago.) Although the price would probably be considered spectacular if it was in Johnson County, it was still rather beyond our budget.

The Fort Scott Country Club is closed for the winter, which means we can't get ahold of anyone to discuss renting it, which means it is not an option - but we did take the opportunity to peer through the windows, and it seemed suitable for what we need, if it comes to that. The Elks Lodge and the Fort Scott Inn both had rooms that were okay, but we really weren't impressed.

I adore the Lyons Twin Mansions, but due to the size and layout of the houses, we would have to do part of the reception outside, which makes me extremely nervous, considering the likelihood of our guests suffering heatstroke. So, our runner-up location of the moment is the Buck Run Community Center, which, although a bit sparse in the aesthetics department, is quite quite quite affordable, and therefore attractive.

Have no fear, we are planning on nailing down exactly what we want in the very near future.

white, stark white, diamond white, off-white, ivory, eggshell, candlelight, cream, rum, champagne

2009-01-02T21:01:00.003-06:00

Ladies, let me tell ya, if you're needing a boost of confidence, it's time to go wedding dress shopping. I have been known to shed a tear or two at the mall, searching for a bra, swimsuit or pair of jeans that fits, but I am having a blast looking at wedding gowns. First of all, these things are made to be the most beautiful item you will ever wear in your entire life. They are created for the express purpose of turning you into a goddess. Everyone knows all eyes are on the bride as she walks down the aisle, and bridal designers work some incredible magic to make that experience perfect.

In other words, even if you don't find "the one" right off the bat, you are going to look darn good in something that you try on.

Secondly, the salespeople at most of these stores work on commission. Yes, I'm sure there are many out there who are snooty and pushy, but at the end of the day, they are all trying to make a sale. It benefits them tremendously to be very very very nice to you, so that you will like them and buy from them. This also means they will compliment you a lot. I highly recommend basking in that adoration. Not to mention, other people in the store (usually mothers) who are sitting around waiting for their bride to be transformed into a fairy princess will happily give you their opinions and praise, too.

Third, no matter how you feel about girly frou-frou accessories, a veil, a tiara and a pair of totally kickin' shoes are bound to make you look and feel gorgeous. Nobody but brides wears all that stuff on their heads these days, so putting it all on is a dramatic change from the humdrum jeans and t-shirt routine. And if, like me, you live in flats and tennies, fancy heels will make you feel like a movie star. Unbelievably, these things bump the already-beautiful dress up a couple notches until you can hardly believe you are staring at yourself in the mirror.

In case you couldn't tell, even though I haven't found a dress yet, I am having fun looking.

And thus concludes the silver lining part of the story.

On to the storm cloud...

Wedding dresses are expensive. Not just a little expensive, either. I don't mind spending money on something I really really want and will be really really happy with, even if it is just for one day. But these big bunches of fabric are a LOT expensive.

There are (relatively) cheap gowns out there, but I don't want to settle for something that isn't flattering or doesn't fit my sense of style. I like a little embellishment, and that costs. But even the dresses with very simple, modern lines can be thousands of dollars.

That does not include the aforementioned veil ($50-500), headpiece ($20-100) nor the shoes ($50-150). Additionally, almost everyone wants alterations (easily $100-300) and fancy bras ($30-80) to make sure this ridiculously costly garment actually fits right.

I'm particularly miffed about the cost of the veil. It appears by far to be the simplest thing to make. Maybe I'm wrong, but how hard is it to take a piece of mesh, sew some little doodads around the edges, attach a hair comb and call it a day?

But, like a million other girls out there, I will most likely get suckered into paying way more than I ever wanted to, just to have that wonderful feeling of looking way better than I ever thought I could. It might be possibly be worth it after all.

But I doubt it.

Wisdom of the Ages, Transmitted Via Beyonce Knowles

2008-12-28T17:19:00.002-06:00

"Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it,

If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it,

Don’t be mad once you see that he want it,

If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it."

- Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)

I've been hearing this song on the radio lately, and it cracks me up. Beyonce knows what she's talking about. Although the feminist in me is more than a little offended by being called "it", like a cow that needs to be branded with her owner's initials, the song's underlying point is valid: Make a commitment to the girl, or sooner or later, the girl will walk away. (Sounds much more empowering that way, doesn't it?)

Honestly, I could care less about the ring for its own sake. After all, it's just a pretty little thing that was dug up out of the ground, given some authentic value as an object of beauty and some arbitrary value as an object of monetary worth, then slipped onto a finger to be admired. But I adore what it stands for. No one should really need an object to hold in their hand that expresses love, honor, and commitment, but it is wonderful to know that someone cares enough to give you one.

Andy and I had talked some about what exactly I wanted in a ring. It sounds a little silly, but I have to admit that Leonardo DiCaprio is the one who instilled my desire to wear a conflict-free diamond. I did not want to celebrate our love with an expensive object that may have financed gross human rights violations. After doing some research, I came to the conclusion that I wanted either 1) a Canadian diamond, 2) a man-made diamond, or 3) no diamond at all.

There are pros and cons to each. Andy had his heart set on a diamond, and he wanted it to be something he could be proud of, too, so options 2 and 3 were out. That left Canadian diamonds, which unlike those in most parts of the world, have a few brands that track their diamonds from the mine to the store. They even etch a microscopic maple leaf into the stone along with the serial number.

I will grant that option 1 is not fool-proof. Other than driving to a diamond mine, digging the thing out, cutting it, polishing it, and setting it into a ring all by yourself, you can never be 100% sure that what you are wearing is what the people who sold it to you told you you were wearing. Stones can get mixed up in the middleman shuffle. I am choosing to trust the Canadians to do the right thing.

Not to mention, many people have concerns about the environmental damage that is done by mining of any type, including the gold that goes into the band. Furthermore, I haven't looked too closely into how my Adidas tennis shoes (or almost anything else that I buy) are being manufactured and sold, so maybe I'm being more than a little hypocritical. I will try to justify myself by pointing out that I do not have the resources to sustain myself completely independently of all other humans, and I don't want to try. It isn't reasonable to ask me to investigate every single thing that I consume. I'm just doing the little bit that I can.

On the other side of the discussion, some might say that the existence of conflict diamonds has been way overblown. DiamondFacts.org says, "Conflict diamonds have been reduced from approximately 4% to considerably less than 1% since the implementation of the Kimberley Process in 2003." However, I could not find any recent numbers to back up either side of the argument. It may indeed be a very small number, but I don't exactly see the World Federation of Diamond Bourses and the International Diamond Manufacturers Association as disinterested parties. Pardon me for retaining a little bit of doubt about the statistics that DeBeers provides.

I will absolutely agree with another point that they make, though, which is that the diamond industry does bring jobs and money to some parts of the world that have precious little else to support their economy. I don't want to take away someone's livelihood, but I don't want to support corrupt corporations and governments, either. Nothing is ever as black and white as we'd like it to be.

On the bright side, my ring is beautiful, I love it, and I'll wear it forever!

We're getting married!

2008-12-18T20:26:00.000-06:00

Andy proposed to me Saturday, December 13th, 2008, as we were looking out over the Country Club Plaza and its gorgeous swathes of Christmas lights from inside the glass elevator of the Intercontinental Hotel. Needless to say, we both had a fabulous weekend.

I thought it would be fun to blog a little bit about our plans and ideas - after all, our wedding will surely be the event of the year . . . if, that is, you only go to one event this year :)

Obviously, we are in the very beginning stages of planning. All we know so far is that we want it to be held somewhere in Kansas, probably in late summer. Our main goal is to make sure that it is meaningful, beautiful, and, last but not least, fun!

So, if you care about all this girly wedding stuff, stay tuned for updates, and if you don't, please just show up and have a good time!

Signed,

The Bubbly Bride-to-Be,

abbie :)

P.S. My engagement ring is off in Michigan somewhere being resized, so as soon as it's back with me where it belongs, there will be pictures galore. As it is, besides myself, Andy, and the jewelry store people, only my roommate Cortney has seen it, so don't feel left out.